How to punish a masochist?

[cariad]

Great ideas, but shins, please be aware that some of these more psychological approaches will cut deep, and should never be used as part of play.

A sub is very dependant upon her Dom, and she will feel completely broken if she does not 'feel' as opposed to just 'know' that you still love and care for her, and it is her behaviour and not her which you disapprove of. Don’t rely on the fact that she must know it because of x, y and z; at such times she is likely to be aware so acutely of how much you mean to her and there will be voices inside her head saying that you are rejecting her.

Please make sure there is clear closure after the event, otherwise it can be damaging to your relationship.

cariad

[Tojo]

An excellent point cariad- I'm constantly aware that I need to be gentle with lisa. She's young & very devoted to what we do.

It's important to know the difference between fun & psychological abuse, it varies with the individual.

Aftercare is most important too- a sub is to be treasured always.

(this is just a general comment shins, not talking to you- I think miss Dashi probably gets treated pretty well)


Tojo

[Psynymph]

i'll be showing this thread to my Dom....He's been haveing the same issues.....i'm a huge painslut and a brat in the sense i've been to known to purposefully push His buttons to get Him to punish me....

But sense i'm coming from the subs position on this.....Timberwolf's suggestion of doing menial task is in my mind, absolutely perfect.

i still remember the first time i got actually punished. or rather, thoroughly punished. i was given a list of chores and i flat out didnt do them, in order to test my Dom's reaction. He has a bad habit of not punishing me at all and i wanted to see if He would.

well i imgained Him coming home, getting all angry, yelling, bending me over His knee and spanking my little ass raw......needless to say i walked around in a erotic euphoria all day at this thought.

But instead He came home, looked at the messy house, and proceeded to flat out ignore me while He went about changing out of His uniform and so on. i pouted and danced about, trying to gain attention. it was driving me up the wall!!!

So He sits down on the couch and turns on the TV, never saying a word, never looking at me. i drop onto the couch next to Him. and proceed to stare at Him, i posture and sigh and do all the sort of bratty "pay attention to me" things.

He still ignores me. Then after about ten minutes He turns to me and gives such a intense look of disapproval it made me want to fall to my knees and beg for forgiveness. But instead i smirked.

He calmly explained to me how disappointed He was in me, how this was in no way showing my desire to submit and how much He hates haveing to punish me. By the end of His chastisment i really wanted to crawl on the floor. i felt horrible for disappointing Him so.

i opened my mouth to start my profuse apologies but He simply held up one finger for silence. He then told me my punishment. i was to sit in a closet, in the dark, for one hour.i'm terribly afraid of the dark. After the first hour He would turn on the closet light, and hand me paper and pen. i was then to write a four page essay on the meaning of submission. i wouldn't be allowed to talk the entire time, go to the bathroom, and i was too be naked on the cold floor. also, after my punishment He refused to play with me in anyway. i'm very playful, so it was torture to go about, making dinner and whatnot, and not be allowed to dance and tease. He also made me sleep on the floor, away from Him.

let me tell you, i was an angel for a LONG time after that. in fact, i can honestly say i havent done anything bad enough since to earn such a punishment again.plus i was the definition of submission the next day, He could have asked ANYTHING of me and i would have more than willing done it, just to fully please Him.

so not that i, as a submissive, wanted to intrude here, but i thought maybe You'd appreciate a similar sub's point of view on this.....

[Ozme52]

Great ideas, but shins, please be aware that some of these more psychological approaches will cut deep, and should never be used as part of play.

A sub is very dependant upon her Dom, and she will feel completely broken if she does not 'feel' as opposed to just 'know' that you still love and care for her, and it is her behaviour and not her which you disapprove of. Don’t rely on the fact that she must know it because of x, y and z; at such times she is likely to be aware so acutely of how much you mean to her and there will be voices inside her head saying that you are rejecting her.

Please make sure there is clear closure after the event, otherwise it can be damaging to your relationship.

cariad

Which is why... it sometimes pays to show her you care enough to spend the time it takes to really give her a really sore ass....

[cariad]

Which is why... it sometimes pays to show her you care enough to spend the time it takes to really give her a really sore ass....