Another great thread Rabbit, and fully behind what you say.

The only thing I would add is that being a sub is not a badge of honour, it is not better to be a sub and than not a sub.

When I chat to newbies, subs and Doms in the room, I sometimes tell them that if they have the option of taking or rejecting this lifestyle, then they should reject it. It is not an easy route, and if it is not what you are at your core, it will end up being painful.

In a true BDSM relationship it is a virtue to be a true sub, in a vanilla relationship even one with some of the paraphernalia of a BDSM one, it is better not to be a true sub. Discover what you are, and seek a relationship accordingly.

cariad