True Control

[markus_valtion]

beautiful. so pure and inspiring. i thank you from the bottom of my heart.

[DJade]

beautiful. so pure and inspiring. i thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Thank you, markus. Your response touches me.

[DJade]

werbored, clipcrop, tastychococakes, Zaine13,

Thank you all so much!

[bevj]

You have given me the reason to keep looking for the right Dom for me, because I had almost ran away again. I found someone that I believed in and we talked and I felt that maybe just maybe I had found someone that wouldn't just enjoy using that power and then walk away as I've come to hate and almost go into nun hood. I told him things that I've kept bottled up so long and we meet and at first I have the doubts in my head and tell him and those doubts are taken away. I trust him and allow me to come out. I felt so alive for the first time and as we said our goodbyes and he said he would contact me I believed him, well that didn't happen and again I start with the feeling as here I come nunhood or don't want nun and don't get nun and don't have nun. lol I still can't keep that from myself as I even taught my children not to give up and keep fighting for what you believe in and want in life. I am so giving and I feel like Its taken but there isn't any caring behind those that take from me. I would lay it at their feet freely as I've done so many and many times but when I can't feel that it makes me go on the run as a frightened child or rabbit. I've always known that I was submissive since I was a very young child 6 or 7 years old. Thats just me and I want to know that what I give is given back and not taken and then thrown to the ground like yesterdays trash. I've opened up and he trashed me.

For those doms/subs that are looking there is a lot that say they are dom or they are sub be careful and that is very important for the sub to know as well, I've come to find this out a few times and its very hard to find one that really is from the lifestyle and those that have read and know what one wants to hear and even though he wasn't one to make headline news like beat me up or worse there are those that would in a heart beat that could hurt or worse to you or me. Be careful please.

I do want to thank you for your thread it does make me add this as a learning tool and hope that someday I may be happy and loved and cared for.
thank you again.
beverly

[DJade]

You have given me the reason to keep looking for the right Dom for me, because I had almost ran away again. I found someone that I believed in and we talked and I felt that maybe just maybe I had found someone that wouldn't just enjoy using that power and then walk away as I've come to hate and almost go into nun hood. I told him things that I've kept bottled up so long and we meet and at first I have the doubts in my head and tell him and those doubts are taken away. I trust him and allow me to come out. I felt so alive for the first time and as we said our goodbyes and he said he would contact me I believed him, well that didn't happen and again I start with the feeling as here I come nunhood or don't want nun and don't get nun and don't have nun. lol I still can't keep that from myself as I even taught my children not to give up and keep fighting for what you believe in and want in life. I am so giving and I feel like Its taken but there isn't any caring behind those that take from me. I would lay it at their feet freely as I've done so many and many times but when I can't feel that it makes me go on the run as a frightened child or rabbit. I've always known that I was submissive since I was a very young child 6 or 7 years old. Thats just me and I want to know that what I give is given back and not taken and then thrown to the ground like yesterdays trash. I've opened up and he trashed me.

For those doms/subs that are looking there is a lot that say they are dom or they are sub be careful and that is very important for the sub to know as well, I've come to find this out a few times and its very hard to find one that really is from the lifestyle and those that have read and know what one wants to hear and even though he wasn't one to make headline news like beat me up or worse there are those that would in a heart beat that could hurt or worse to you or me. Be careful please.

I do want to thank you for your thread it does make me add this as a learning tool and hope that someday I may be happy and loved and cared for.
thank you again.
beverly

You are very welcome. Don't give up. The right person is out there. Sometimes it takes a while to find them but do not give up hope!

[troublemkr{jonjon}]

I think that is one of the most beautiful thread I've read... Thank you. Is it just me ? I feel like something heavy came off my shoulder.