Balancing Faith and BDSM

[AdrianaAurora]

Oh, just to clarify something... I have never EVER been taught that sex is inherently "bad" or "evil". I guess church may have tried that, but I had very good parents who taught me that there is absolutely nothing bad about sex, that it is a gift from God to be enjoyed (but because of its binding nature, within marriage). I don't believe there is anything wrong with sex.

My questions came mainly from the fact that I top my guy, rather than submit to him.

I'll still have some more soul searching to do, but everyone has made some really helpful comments. I've always intellectually understood the difference between religion's rules and a relationship with a "personal God" (as TomofSweden stated)... but I guess I never really understood it in my heart until now.

I think we all have that kind of struggle, submissives and Dommes. For me it was, how do I reconcile being a feminist and my need for submission. Maybe its a women thing, we are inherently thought to feel guilty, either for being "weak" or for being "strong". Anyway, I realized there was nothing to reconcile. People's personalities are not linear creations, we are complex, illogical creators. Both of these traits are a part of me, and I am just me. As long as you stay true to yourself, and this is who you are, embrace it.

And btw, sex is more fun when its a little "bad", .

[TomOfSweden]

I think we all have that kind of struggle, submissives and Dommes. For me it was, how do I reconcile being a feminist and my need for submission. Maybe its a women thing, we are inherently thought to feel guilty, either for being "weak" or for being "strong". Anyway, I realized there was nothing to reconcile. People's personalities are not linear creations, we are complex, illogical creators. Both of these traits are a part of me, and I am just me. As long as you stay true to yourself, and this is who you are, embrace it.

And btw, sex is more fun when its a little "bad", .

I'd like to add, that this isn't a specifically religious/Christian problem. We all have rules and "dogmas" imposed on us from our culture. Most of them are actually helpful, (like being polite rather than rude, or giving your set to elderly). We all have to do soul searching and figure out what is right for us in our heart.

I had my own demons to combat, but from the feminist direction. I was living with feminist dogmas where submission of women to men was inherently evil. I've got nothing against feminism. It was just that it has coloured Swedish culture pretty strongly.

We all have our internal battles to fight. I think that as long as you go to yourself instead of going to any external person, (priest, father, mother, boss, golf partner, husband, philosopher, scientist, etc) will only end well no matter the outcome. Only the road will differ. Letting other people tell you what is right for you obviously won't work. They aren't you. But that doesn't mean that their words aren't valuable. That priest you mentioned might say tonnes of great and wise things, but you have to decide which of them apply to your specific situation.

Every nugget of wisdom always has a specific scenario in mind when formulated. That is true of the Bible and its true of everything ever said. And few people fit that scenario perfectly. Maybe a little bit, but not perfectly.

[AdrianaAurora]

I had my own demons to combat, but from the feminist direction. I was living with feminist dogmas where submission of women to men was inherently evil. I've got nothing against feminism. It was just that it has coloured Swedish culture pretty strongly.

Personally I too have a problem with women (who not unlike religious leaders) have distorted feminism to the point of such absurdity.

To me feminism isn't about belitteling men, but empowering women.

[MissElizabeth87]

And btw, sex is more fun when its a little "bad", .

Yes it most definitely is... haha.


I don't get where people decided Christianity was all about rules anyways. I mean... if you read the parts of the NT where Jesus was actually ALIVE, He seemed pretty anti-rule to me. Seems like the whole book of rules deal came from a bunch of people after He was up in heaven, claiming to know His will.

And I totally agree that people should actually read the bible. I got to take classes these past couple of years in school that required in depth reading and outlining of the whole dang thing. I don't claim to know even a lot about the book, but I have at least read it.