Are switches confused or is everybody else?

[denuseri]

I would edit in that I meant to say the purpose of my participation in the thread with my posts was to present a certian perspective. Which I did. Which ironically some have decided to make personal idk why and I apologize to everyone here for not rising above and even bothering to attempt to clairify my own postion on the issue.

My posts before were not directed at any one in paticular... where as the ones i am responding too now are....which will eventually only spiral into an argument as opposed to a debate on the topic.

Ergo I will not respond any further in this venue.

Please remember to switch the lights out when you are done.


Peace.

[thir]

I would edit in that I meant to say the purpose of my participation in the thread with my posts was to present a certian perspective. Which I did. Which ironically some have decided to make personal idk why and I apologize to everyone here for not rising above and even bothering to attempt to clairify my own postion on the issue.

This paragraph is a bit unclear to me, but I do see that the gist of it is that we have a beef with each other. I would like to address that as best I may.

Nothing in what I have have written was in any way meant to be a personal attack.

In hindsight, though, I do realize that it can be seen as such. First, because though I did in fact read everything carefully, I have not commented much on the first part of your mails, which I probably should have.

Secondly, my response was in fact not to you alone, but in a way to a number of people on a number of lists. Let me explain that.

The thing is, I have moved country (from Denmark to England, but also to UK lists) and find that conditions with respect to BDSM are very different indeed from what I was used to. Sexual freedom seems less, somehow, and the attitude to BDSM much more hostile. In addition, I have always been safe with the concept of switch, since it is generally accepted and frankly no big deal where I come from.

It wasn't as much a cultural shock I think as a continual drip drip of derogatory remarks about switching on every BDSM list I have been on, and I think on reading your mails I got to a sort of saturation point where I just felt bad enough to start saying something.

Because although you say otherwise in the first parts of your mails, you do keep quoting people whom you think are worth listening to who do attack the concept of switches, not leaving it to people themselves to define themselves, and leaving me with a feeling of being under siege not just from the vanilla world, but from within the BDSM world itself, which is something I have never experienced before.

These quotes, which you alternate agree with and distance yourself from, do in effect tell my that my Lord and Master is a sort of fake and second-rate. Of course I take offence at that, though in truth it does not ruffle His feathers and never would.

My posts before were not directed at any one in paticular... where as the ones i am responding too now are....which will eventually only spiral into an argument as opposed to a debate on the topic.

Ergo I will not respond any further in this venue.

My conclusion exactly. So we do agree on something ;-)
Personal attacks only destroy the atmosphere of the list, and makes it harder to have fun and learn something. It is no good at all.

Please remember to switch the lights out when you are done.
Peace.

Humour is an interesting thing. I was in a group discussing its use in schools and working places. We pretty much came to these conclusions:

Generally one has to be able to take a joke.
In jokes concerning some topics such as looks, handicaps, racial and religious stuff and such people who make them are generally supposed to tread lighter, but still a lot of jokes are made out of thoughtlessness and with no malicious intent.
So where is the line where humour crosses the line into bullying?

It is quite simply when the receiver clearly indicates 'you are hurting me', and the person goes right on doing it.